Hi, I’m Eeyore.

“When I came to MaryJane’s, I was a sad sight to see. Pretty much the longhorn version of a Sarah McLaughlin SPCA commercial, my mother died when I was …

… young, and I was left to make it on the range alone at a nearby ranch. Dubbed a ‘bummer calf,’ I was re-named Eeyore when I arrived at MaryJane’s because of my size and countenance.

Barely able to raise my head, I was nursed back to health. I’m still a little small, almost stunted, but I am slowly and surely learning how to be more bullish, even though I’m missing some of my parts.” (Editor’s note: steering clear of the details on that.)

Milky Way, a true professional in the business, has shown me how to scratch oneself publicly.

How to run away when a pretty lady tries to catch you.

The art of hiding.

I’ve even learned how to chaw on some grass; it just makes me feel a little more rogue.

All in all, things are looking up, and I am feeling right at home here and have become a good buddy to Milky Way. Though, from time-to-time, I still earn the title of Eeyore—that sad little donkey in Winnie the Pooh.

It’s snowing still, said Eeyore gloomily.
 So it is.
 And freezing.
 Is it?
 Yes, said Eeyore. However, he said, brightening up a little, we haven’t had an earthquake lately.

Happy to be settled into my new home at MaryJane’s.”