Not So Wet Anymore

Wondering who I am? I’m Merit Badge Awardee Jane (MBA Jane for short). In my former life …

This week for my Merit Badge, I’m conserving water. Sounds simple enough, right?

With me … not so much.

If there was a 12-step recovery program for H2O addicts, I’d be a member. Actually, I wouldn’t just be a member, I’d be the president. I have a need, you see: a need for cleanliness and all things water-logged. Not to mention, all things bubbly and scented.

So, I decided first to forego my …

… nightly bubble bath and cut back to every other day. The days in between, I’m showering and I’m doing it in a hurry. That’s right, no more leisurely standing around, contemplating my pedicure and day dreaming about movie stars: it’s all wham bam, thank you ma’am, shave the pits, wash the hair, scrub the ears, and I’m outta there.

At least, that was my plan. What’s that they say about good intentions, you say? The road to hell may be paved with Tangerine Honey Deep-conditioning Treatments (it needs five-seven minutes to properly absorb!) and Apricot Walnut Facial Scrub (rub clockwise for at least three minutes before rinsing!) and No-Scent Nair (again with the five minute wait thing). My showers were becoming an exercise in restraint, a tutorial in doing without, a lesson in withdrawal.

I found myself researching the No ‘Poo method.

Yes.

Oh, yes.

It is a method and one that just might save me a couple of Andrew Jacksons each month.

What is it? It’s saying adios to your shampoo and conditioner.

I KNOW.

Freaky, weird, and yet so … so, right, somehow.

Instead of my normal over-priced salon concoctions (likely filled with all sorts of nasty chemicals anyway), I started using just a touch of baking soda. That’s right—baking soda. You know the stuff; it gets rid of last night’s Kung Pao Chicken odors in the fridge and makes your cakes rise. Also good for scrubbing and cleaning. There’s really nothing this little box of powdered gold can’t do! And it’s like, a buck a box. My handbag was singing a joyous tune.

Letting go of my conditioner and cream rinses and leave ins and whatnots, was a bit harder. I bit back tears and inhaled their bottles deeply before retiring them to the back of the bathroom cupboard. Instead of those creamy potions, I am using …

… get ready …

apple-cider vinegar.

Which, I gotta say, smells a bit heavier on the vinegar side than the apple-cider side. I am compelled to admit my head wafts fumes a bit like an Italian salad. Or a pickle.

But, no matter.

My locks are more lustrous and shiny than they ever have been. Feel thicker and more voluminous, too (a claim my Lemon Souffle Cream Rinse never really fulfilled anyway).

There is a bit of adjustment, I confess. I miss the lotion-y feel of a big dollop of product, the scent of something fruity filling the shower stall, and the ease with which my brush traveled through my tangles afterwards.

To be honest, I’ve had to change the channels when an Herbal Essences commercial comes on for fear of falling off the wagon, and I have an insatiable craving for pickles quite frequently, but I think water conservation and No ‘Poo-ing is the wave of the future.