Author Archives: mbajane

The adorable, always humorous MBA Jane is my way of honoring our Sisterhood Merit Badge program, now with 7,428 dues-paying members who have earned an amazing number of merit badges so far—10,782 total! Take it away, MBA Jane!!! ~MaryJane 

Continue reading →

The adorable, always humorous MBA Jane is my way of honoring our Sisterhood Merit Badge program, now with 7,428 dues-paying members who have earned an amazing number of merit badges so far—10,782 total! Take it away, MBA Jane!!! ~MaryJane 

For this week’s Make It Easy/Put Me In, Coach! Beginner Level Young Cultivator Merit Badge, I wrangled Andy off the couch.

This may sound easy enough, but it was kinda like wrestling a lethargic octopus. Once I finally got him off the furniture, his body left an Andy-shaped dent in the cushions. I lectured him about the seriousness of bed sores and gangrene setting in.

“But, Auntie!” he wailed. “Summer vacation!”

“Summer’s over, kid,” I answered, trying to fluff the pillows. They were a loss, so I settled for hiding the remote control in the potted fern.

“Stop making me do stuff …” He flopped onto the floor.

“Oh, no, you don’t, young sir,” I replied, flipping him back over. “No indentations in the carpet. Come on. We’re going out for sports.”

photo by Edward N. Johnson via Wikimedia Commons

That got his attention. Well, by ‘got his attention,’ I mean that he blinked twice, which I took to mean he was down with the plan. Sometimes with preteens, you got to take what you can get as far as Proof of Life.

In the car, we talked over what kind of sports or activities he would like to try. The kid mumbles a lot so I went back to the blinking form of communication. Then he said something that sounded like mumbo-jumbo,

Parkour.

“I’m sorry, what did you say?” I asked, politely. “Pork? Are you hungry?”

“Parkour, Auntie. Now that you’ve got me thinking, I have always wanted to do parkour.”

“Park or … what?”

He sighed, and passed me his phone where he had pulled up the definition. Ah-ha!

par·kour

: the sport of traversing environmental obstacles by running, climbing, or leaping rapidly and efficiently

I got it then. “Ninja stuff! Spiderman! Yes?”

“Yes!”

photo by amagill via Wikimedia Commons

Well, color me red but I didn’t know there was a name for such shenanigans, much less places you could go to take actual lessons in jumping off buildings, flying down rooftops, and launching your body through space. It seemed a little dangerous (And something I might have to sugar-coat to Andy’s mom. Ahem.), but I was happy to see my little merit-badge protégé getting excited about something.

In order to fully supervise the imp, I signed up for a class myself. Oh yes, I did!

I admit I was nervous, but luckily the instructors didn’t expect me to leap tall buildings in a single bound right in the beginning. In fact, there were no tall buildings in the gym. Whew. What they did have were large wooden boxes in different shapes and sizes, rock walls, ledges, ropes, mats, and all sorts of other obstacle-course-type things.

Since I’m one of those persons who can trip over flat surfaces, I let Andy give it a go first. It was nice to see him breaking a sweat, running around like a chicken with his head cut off, and practicing his new skills. Much better than say, watching him play video games till his eyes crossed and spider webs formed in his hair.

I even got to try my hand at jumping across long distances, pulling myself up a wall, and rediscovering the lost art of somersaults. I felt rather ninja like, I must say. I even hummed my own theme music.

On the way home, Andy thanked me for getting him out of the couch cushions. He even used real words (not blinking).

Continue reading →

The adorable, always humorous MBA Jane is my way of honoring our Sisterhood Merit Badge program, now with 7,428 dues-paying members who have earned an amazing number of merit badges so far—10,782 total! Take it away, MBA Jane!!! ~MaryJane 

For this week’s Stitching and Crafting/All Tied Up Beginner Level Young Cultivator Merit Badge, I had Piper and Nora over for the afternoon. The last time I kid-sat for these two little whippersnappers, we had had an arts and crafts day, and well, let’s just say my living room will never be the same. Not to mention Piper and Nora’s laundry.

Artists are messy. I’m sure Van Gogh’s mother was beside herself on laundry day. Right?

photo by LearningLark via Flickr.com

Anyway, I couldn’t just ban arts and crafts altogether—I mean, that would be cruel and unusual punishment for two little farmgirls who love to create. So, we came up with a fabulous idea: earn a new Merit Badge, and design our own artist’s smocks to cut down on the mess of future art projects.

Note to self: making a mess while creating your answer to making a mess is … a messy paradox. Maybe I should’ve bought smocks for them to make their homemade smocks in. Ah well, live and learn, Janie my girl.

You can use a premade smock and do your decorating from that stage, or if you’re feeling super crafty and DIY-esque, you can make your smock from all sorts of things you likely have lying around the house:

• Pillowcases are the perfect size for most artistic munchkins. Cut a hole in the top for the head, and two smaller ones at the sides for their arms. Hem the holes, or use bias tape, to avoid fraying.
• An adult-size T-shirt also makes a great smock for littles. Cut off the sleeves if desired.
• A terrycloth towel (size depends on size of child; usually a large-ish hand towel is best). Attach a loop of ribbon for placing around head, and tie two more ribbons at the side for tying around waist.
• If you’re wanting a smock just for a day and don’t mind tossing it in the trash when your epic art afternoon is through, use a paper bag. Follow directions for the pillowcase smock above. These are nice for an entire classroom for a one-day art project.
• A man’s or woman’s button-down shirt put on backwards makes a great smock.
• Recycled denim overalls make great smocks. Keep the straps and the front part, and cut off the legs. These are extra nice because they’re sturdy, and they have pockets.

photo by Elaine via Flickr.com

Once you’ve decided what kind of smock you are using, have your wee farmkid decorate. Piper chose puffy paints, and Nora chose her button collection because she had recently learned how to sew on buttons. Other ideas for decorating your new smock:

• Handprints. We don’t recommend using red paint, though. Kinda looked like a crime scene … ahem.
• Tie-dye.
• Fabric markers or paint.
• Iron-on patches.
• Simple applique with shapes and embroidery floss.
• Ruffles and lace for hems.
• Pockets.
• Rick-rack.

By the time an hour or two had gone by, we had puffy paint in our ears and buttons between our toes, but we had two gorgeous and one-of-a-kind smocks for our next art project.

Continue reading →

The adorable, always humorous MBA Jane is my way of honoring our Sisterhood Merit Badge program, now with 7,387 dues-paying members who have earned an amazing number of merit badges so far—10,656 total! Take it away, MBA Jane!!! ~MaryJane 

Wondering who I am? I’m Merit Badge Awardee Jane (MBA Jane for short). In my former life…

For this week’s Farm Kitchen/Table Talk Beginner Level Young Cultivator Merit Badge, I gave Nora the job of setting her family’s table each night.*

This posed a couple of problems, the first being that they rarely sat down to dinner together. Between sports practices and late nights at the office and different hungry bellies, it just wasn’t happening enough to make setting a table worth it. I pictured their dining room table looking like something out of Miss Havisham’s house … great for a Halloween scene, but not so inspiring for family life.

So I took Mr. and Mrs. Nora’s Parents out back and gave them a stern talking to. They promised to rearrange their schedules to accommodate seven nights in a row of family dinner.

Nora and I got crackin’.

photo by Alexandra Constantin via Wikimedia Commons

First, we went through the kitchen, looking for little-used dishes. We figured this was a special week, so no holds barred! We got out the good stuff, that’s usually only reserved for holidays, plus some even perkier perks: things like cloth napkins (we attempted some fancy folding, but evidently we need a whole ‘nother merit badge for that), tablecloths, wine goblets for ice water, and even a nifty candlestick holder, complete with candles. Who doesn’t love a candlelit dinner, am I right? You know I am.

It turns out our little experiment was a big hit. The whole family loved the atmosphere so much that the seven days flew by and extended into nine. Nora got even more creative and began making homemade placecards and even menus. Then, she picked themes for her dining-room restaurant: barbeque night complete with a picnic style on the floor, Italian night with a checkered tablecloth and background opera music (reenacting the spaghetti scene from Lady and the Tramp was a must), and a breakfast-for-dinner night where she required everyone to dress in pajamas for their pancake supper.

After the nine nights of feasting, they must have realized how sad I was to be missing out (I think they saw me peeking through the front window) and they let me in for night #10. Too bad it was Chinese night—I was nearly impaled by a chopstick. But, no matter.

Life went back to almost normal for Nora’s family, and family dinner nights aren’t every single night anymore, but they are a minimum of two nights per week now. Hey, that’s two nights for everyone to look forward to—and two nights I don’t have to set my own table. Voila!

*Note: To earn this Young Cultivator Badge, your youngster only has to set the table one night per week for a month. Nora and I just like overachieving.

Continue reading →

The adorable, always humorous MBA Jane is my way of honoring our Sisterhood Merit Badge program, now with 7,387 dues-paying members who have earned an amazing number of merit badges so far—10,656 total! Take it away, MBA Jane!!! ~MaryJane 

Wondering who I am? I’m Merit Badge Awardee Jane (MBA Jane for short). In my former life …   

For this week’s Each Other/Her-Story Intermediate Level Merit Badge, I got to pick another woman who was influential and powerful and inspiring (this time, living or dead) in my country. I had so many to choose from, it was hard to pick! It was like being in the line at the ice cream parlor … how to choose, how to choose? Which explains why I usually get three scoops. Which explains why my pants don’t button. Ahem.

But back to the badge, Madge!

I decided to go with someone I’d admired all my live-long days, and who I had originally thought of back during my Beginner Level badge earning: Audrey Hepburn.

Screenshot of William Holden and Audrey Hepburn from the trailer for the film w:en:Sabrina (1954 film) via Wikimedia Commons

After all, she seemed a practically perfect woman in every way (much like Mary Poppins, only, you know, real). She had style and grace, charm and wit, sure, but she did so much more!

screenshot of Audrey Hepburn from the trailer for the film Breakfast at Tiffany’s via Wikimedia Commons

In particular order, here are the most amazing things I found out about my dear Audrey:

• Audrey spoke fluently Dutch, Italian, Spanish, German, French, and English. I, myself, speak three languages: English, sarcasm, and whale.
• She is one of the few people who are a true EGOT, winning Emmy, Grammy, Oscar and Tony Awards.
• She was sent away to boarding school at the ripe old age of 5.
• Once the Germans invaded the Netherlands where Audrey lived, she became a member of the Dutch Resistance, where she delivered messages and packages and performed in clandestine performances of ballet for fundraising.
• During the Occupation, Audrey would make cakes and breads out of ground tulip bulbs. This affected her health and she developed anemia, and also had a hard time gaining weight for the rest of her life. She was told she would not be strong enough to continue with ballet dancing, and began to concentrate more on acting.
• Despite her father being a Nazi sympathizer and having left their family when Audrey was a child, she reached out to him in the sixties and supported him financially until his death.
• The dress she wore in Breakfast at Tiffany’s is considered the most iconic dress of all time, and is the inspiration behind the term ‘little black dress.’
• Cary Grant was quoted as saying, ‘All I want for Christmas is to be in another picture with Audrey Hepburn.’ Incidentally, I’ve been quoted as saying, ‘All I want for Christmas is Cary Grant.’
• She was appointed Goodwill Ambassador of UNICEF and United States President George H. W. Bush presented her with the Presidential Medal of Freedom in recognition of her work with UNICEF.
• The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences posthumously awarded her the Jean Hersholt Humanitarian Award for her contribution to humanity, with her son accepting on her behalf. Grateful for her own good fortune after enduring the German occupation as a child, she dedicated the remainder of her life to helping impoverished children in the poorest nations. Though she had done work for UNICEF in the 1950s, starting in 1954 with radio presentations, this was a much higher level of dedication. Her family said that the thoughts of dying, helpless children consumed her for the rest of her life.
• In 2002, at the United Nations Special Session on Children, UNICEF honored Hepburn’s legacy of humanitarian work by unveiling a statue, “The Spirit of Audrey”, at UNICEF’s New York headquarters. Her service for children is also recognized through the U.S. Fund for UNICEF’s Audrey Hepburn Society.

Continue reading →

The adorable, always humorous MBA Jane is my way of honoring our Sisterhood Merit Badge program, now with 7,387 dues-paying members who have earned an amazing number of merit badges so far—10,656 total! Take it away, MBA Jane!!! ~MaryJane 

For this week’s Each Other/Big Kid Now Intermediate Level Young Cultivator Merit Badge, Piper, Andy, Nora, and Yours Truly buckled down. When we earned our Beginner Level Merit Badge, we had checked out most of the Non-Fiction section of the local library, and now we were settling in for a long winter’s nap. I mean, a long afternoon of reading. Also, it’s fall. I really gotta work on my analogies.

Is there a badge for that?

We had so many books we spent an hour organizing them, which caused some issues. Pipes likes organizing things by color (you should see her nail polish collection), Nora recently learned how to alphabetize and wanted to show her skillz, and Andy, well, Andy is Andy and mostly he wants to do the opposite of what the girls want to do. He just wanted to stack his books up high and play a game of Jenga with them.

photo by Guma89 via Wikimedia Commons

I had to pull out my Auntie card and show ‘em I meant business. I mean, this was the easy part: finding a career they could really sink their teeth into. After that, the hard part came: putting together costumes for their said career and presenting it to their loved ones. I had stage fright already.

We spent some time looking through our tomes of inspiration and organizing them according to our own personal preferences. We also did some swapping between one another. Evidently, Andy lost interest in deep-sea diving for treasure and sunken ships because … well, sharks. But Nora decided sharks were merely misunderstood creatures and she snagged the book on deep-sea diving. Then Pipes decided she wasn’t interested in hair and cosmetology after all because fumes give her a headache, but Andy was kinda into the idea of styling coiffures. So, at the end of a day, they had chosen their professions (liable to change eleventy-seven times, plus four):

• Piper decided there was nothing better in life than being a pastry chef. Which, honestly, who’s gonna argue with that kind of logic? Also, the fumes would be buttery, sugary, and delightful, so I thought she was really onto something. We fashioned her a chef’s hat and coat and to accompany her presentation, she made everyone homemade snickerdoodles.

photo by petempich via Wikimedia Commons

• Nora decided she wanted to combine two of her loves: writing notes down in a notebook like a journalist, and traveling the world. The result? Travel writer! We had a little fun with her costume: we pulled together as many geographically diverse costume props we could come up with (like a French beret, an Indian sari, and Native American moccasins), and she had a blast.
• Andy, after a shockingly long time of deliberation, came up with his dream career: he wanted more than anything to be a  … dad. We were all surprised he left off his dream of world domination, super spy, and rocket ship pilot, but we were pleased. Turns out he said, you could have ALL those things when you become a dad, because playing with your kids was a full time and important job. He dressed in his own dad’s clothes, which hung off him quite hilariously but got the job done. He ended his presentation with his claims that he would have so many kids they would always have a basketball team at the ready, and he only planned on having boys because girls have cooties. On a completely unrelated note, the position of Andy’s wife is currently open.

Continue reading →

The adorable, always humorous MBA Jane is my way of honoring our Sisterhood Merit Badge program, now with 7,387 dues-paying members who have earned an amazing number of merit badges so far—10,656 total! Take it away, MBA Jane!!! ~MaryJane 

For this week’s Cleaning Up/Energize Me Beginner Level Young Cultivator Merit Badge, Andy and I went on a tour of his house, pen and paper at the ready. We were List-maker Extraordinaires already, and now we were putting our skillz to good use: counting everything around the house that uses energy, how our food is kept cold, how the car starts, even how we need and collect energy and keep warm ourselves.

We started off by counting the things that plug in. In five minutes, we had run out of fingers and toes to keep track of our counting, and had to rely on tally marks in our notebook. Guess how many things we found plugged in (not counting other things that use electricity but weren’t plugged in at the moment, like the blender in the cupboard or the hair dryer in the bathroom)?

29!!

It was fairly shocking. Get it? Shocking? Hahaha, just a little electricity humor for ya. Back to the show. Ahem.

Next, we lovingly gave the hardworking refrigerator a hug (and snacked on some cheese slices to keep our own energy levels up) and lowered the thermostat a degree for conservations sake. Then we flipped over to the next page of our notebook and began noticing and counting the lightbulbs in the house.

Guess how many? No, really, go ahead and guess. I’ll wait.

If you said 32, you would be frighteningly good at this. Or perhaps your electrician wired your house as well as Andy’s. Of course, eight of those were in the dining room chandelier, but still. That’s a lot of bulbs! Then we remembered the garage … more bulbs, not to mention the electric garage door opener and the two cars themselves.

I was starting to get a bit bummed out at the carbon footprint we were leaving, so we ate some more cheese while we lowered the thermostat one more degree. We turned the topic of discussion to our own energy levels and degrees of warm fuzzies.

What do we need, as people, to keep our energy up?

Jane’s List of Must Haves for Healthy Energy Levels:

• Coffee and/or tea. Preferably organic and fresh. Hot in the winter, icy cold in the summer.

• A good slice of sharp Cheddar.

• A hand-knit sweater.

• A high protein and fiber breakfast.

• Snacks.

• Brisk walks in the cool air.

• A seaside trip each year.

• Snowball fights.

• Pets.

• Walking instead of driving when possible.

• Writing letters to friends.

• Holiday traditions.

• Good books.

• Baking bread.

• Hobbies.

• Occasional naps (I like mine on Sundays).

• Fresh air.

• Dates with Mr. Wonderful.

Andy’s Must Haves for High Energy Levels:

• Soccer practices.

• Lots of sleep.

• Smoothies with fresh fruit and honey and whipped cream.

• Headstands.

• Somersaults.

• Spaghetti with meatballs at least once per week.

• Pizza with extra cheese.

• Trail mix.

• Ninja practice.

• Bugging and pestering little sisters.

• Homework.

• Bedtime stories.

• Kick the can, basketball, and street hockey with neighbor kids.

• Climbing trees.

• Fort building.

• Arm wrestling.

• More spaghetti and meatballs.

• Midnight snacks.

This wasn’t part of the badge earning, but we decided to swap lists for the next week.

After all, who couldn’t use a bit more somersaulting and headstands in their lives?

Continue reading →

The adorable, always humorous MBA Jane is my way of honoring our Sisterhood Merit Badge program, now with 7,387 dues-paying members who have earned an amazing number of merit badges so far—10,656 total! Take it away, MBA Jane!!! ~MaryJane 

Wondering who I am? I’m Merit Badge Awardee Jane (MBA Jane for short). In my former life …  

For this week’s Each Other/Calligraphy Beginner Level Merit Badge, I bought myself a brand, spankin’ new notebook journal. I also invested in a nifty calligraphy pen. Then I tackled a skill my third-grade teacher wished I had applied myself to tackling quite a long time ago …

Penmanship.

In other words, I should’ve been a doctor. My autograph is a thing of legend. And by legend, of course I mean, unintelligible and incomprehensible scrawling. My handwritten letters to my Irish pen pal look as though perhaps my hen, Miss Toile, scratched them out with her toes. While balancing on one wing. Intoxicated. And upside down.

But, as I always say, go big or go home. In other words, learn calligraphy if you can’t print well.

I was able to read through—and get inspired by—Modern Calligraphy: Everything You Need to Know to Get Started in Script Calligraphy by Molly Suber Thorpe. (The book required for this badge is available on loan from MaryJanesFarm; contact library@maryjanesfarm.org.)

It was all so pretty and soothing to the eye. But appreciating it and actually learning it are two different things. (Ask me how I know. Go ahead. Because I have earned a badge or two in my time, that’s how.)

I’ve always had a thing for markers and pens and pencils and Sharpies. Ahhh, Sharpies, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways …

1. Decorating pumpkins for Halloween when I can’t find my good carving knife.
2. Addressing envelopes in a colorful manner.
3. Labeling personal items when vacationing or camping in a group.
4. Labeling my lunch at work (get away from my Chicken Burrito Bowl, this means you!).
5. Coloring in those neato coloring books they make for grown-ups.
6. Hiding a scuff in my good black pumps.
7. Countless arts and crafts projects.

I knew I would learn to love my new calligraphy pen at least as much as my collection of Sharpies. We just had to get to know one another …

… she said, as she put the first stroke to paper …

Well, it wasn’t love at first sight, me and calligraphy, but all new relationships must survive a little test of fire, right? Ours wasn’t fire per se, but more like smudging, errors, creases, and one spilt beverage. That’s okay, I turned the page (literally), and began again.

I moved at approximately the speed of turtles after a turkey and pasta dinner, but I did manage to get through the whole alphabet.

photo by .angels. via Flickr.com

And, I must say, my calligraphy was rather lovely to look upon! I mean, I’m no Niels Shoe Meulman (inventor of Calligraphiti, the merging of calligraphy with graffiti), or Yazan Halwani (one of the youngest Arabic calligraphers around), or Edward Johnston (the father of modern calligraphy), or Wen Zhengming (Ming dynasty painter and calligrapher).

But, hey, I am Jane, Farmgirl Extraordinaire, Merit Badge earner, and the best calligrapher in my house!

Miss Toile notwithstanding.

Continue reading →

The adorable, always humorous MBA Jane is my way of honoring our Sisterhood Merit Badge program, now with 7,328 dues-paying members who have earned an amazing number of merit badges so far—10,420 total! Take it away, MBA Jane!!! ~MaryJane 

For this week’s Make It Easy/Mindfulness Meditation Beginner Level Merit Badge, I told myself to take it easy.

“Take it easy, Me,” said I. I tried to muster up my sage, mindful, deliberate, and in other words, calm, cool, and collected inner voice. Since my inner voice is typically a hungry toddler who needs a potty break, it took some doing.

Meditation. Isn’t that something yogis do (not the bear … the super flexible people who sip on shots of wheatgrass and fold their legs behind their ears, all while looking spiffy in expensive stretch pants and complicated sports bras)?

Or perhaps it’s something Buddhist monks do?

Or New Age tree huggers?

No?

I, too, can (and probably should) meditate?

Well, color me surprised.

photo by Sebastien Wiertz via Flickr.com

The very idea was pretty intriguing, so I did what I do best: I researched my newfound interest at the library while munching on a ham sammie.

Interesting side note: you can trace what my interests have been while being a farmgirl earning badges based on the organic mayonnaise stains I leave behind at the library.

Another interesting side note: I am no longer allowed to bring in food to the library. That librarian is old school and a bit of a tyrant. Sheesh. Accidently leave behind one small tuna bagel on a shelf and you’re banned for life. Unfair.

Anyway, I learned that for mucho beginners like moi, you can find guided meditations on the Web. How cool! I’m all about tutorials. They’re the bee’s knees. You can find a tutorial for anything these days: I’m currently filming my own on “How to Eat Your Way Through a Box of Tacos In Three Easy Steps for Health and Happiness Part I.” I think there’s a real market for it. After all, my tutorial on “How To Eat Your Way Through the Non-Fiction Section at Your Library” practically went viral.

Until Librarian Sour-Face left me 1 star on Yelp.

Humph.

Armed with some interesting guided mediations, a scented candle (made by Yours Truly, of course), a CD of Yanni (seemed appropriate, but perhaps too stereotypical?), and my own not-so-expensive stretchy pants and not-so-complicated sports bra, I began.

To earn your Beginner Badge, you only need to mediate for five minutes per day, for one week.

Me, being an over-achiever, I way outdid that. I mediated for two hours per day the first week!

Okay, okay, 1 hour and 55 minutes of that was spent snoring facedown, drooling on my yoga mat, and nearly burning the house down with my soothing lavender scented candle. Lesson learned.

photo by Chika Watanabe via Flickr.com

The next week, I sheepishly started over, and changed up the routine a bit. I exchanged Yanni for Dance Party Jam Mix Tape IV, and switched the candle scent to Bacon (who can sleep while you’re listening to Pump It Up and smelling bacon? No one, that’s who). I also put the yoga mat back from whence it came (propping up my busted dryer door), and retired the not-too-complicated sports bra.

Turns out I mediated much better in my old jeans and flannel shirt at my kitchen table, anyway.

At the end of Week II, I was not as well rested as Week I, but I felt quite a bit more mindful and energetic.

Though that also could be my bacon-scented candle.

Continue reading →

The adorable, always humorous MBA Jane is my way of honoring our Sisterhood Merit Badge program, now with 7,328 dues-paying members who have earned an amazing number of merit badges so far—10,420 total! Take it away, MBA Jane!!! ~MaryJane 

Wondering who I am? I’m Merit Badge Awardee Jane (MBA Jane for short). In my former life …   

For this week’s Stitching and Crafting/Weaving In and Out Intermediate Level Young Cultivator Merit Badge, Piper, Andy, and I stepped up the ante. Now that we were pretty proficient at how to braid and make our own friendship bracelets,

photo by Nina Helmer via Flickr.com

we had to branch out and …

make another using a different material this time and give one away.

Seemed simple enough. Aww, naiveté, thy name is Jane …

We already had enough friendship bracelets to adorn most of the neighborhood (and in Andy’s case, the local football team), but we were fresh outta yarn. We pondered and pondered: what else could be braided?

Well, that was a loaded question for Lil’ Miss Pipes.

“What can’t be braided?” she rephrased, in delight.

Umm, turns out that became a list.

Things That Cannot Be Braided:
• Rocks
• Granola bars
• Chicken feathers
• Beef jerky
• Sticks of gum
• All the electrical cords behind the entertainment cabinet (but only cuz Dad says no)
• Toothbrushes
• Dog’s ears (but only because they won’t sit still long enough)
• Kitten’s tails (see above)
• Forks
• Spoons
• Knives

And how do we know these items aren’t braidable, you might ask? Because we didn’t attempt them, naturally … sigh.

The next list seemed more fun (not to mention, more applicable).

Things That CAN Be Braided:
• Yarn
• Ribbons
• Shoelaces (not while people are wearing them, though. Not nice, Andy)
• Some flower stalks or long grasses
• Strips of cloth or lace
• Rickrack
• Your mom’s purse straps
• Your dad’s belts
• Curly ribbon on packages/gifts
• Headbands and hair ties
• Curtain tie-backs
• Fringe
• Shirt sleeves (Don’t ask. I think they were making homemade strait jackets or something.)
• Fruit leather (sticky, but worth the flavor combination)
• Licorice sticks
• Dental floss
• Bungee cords
• Bread dough
• Embroidery floss
• Men’s dress socks or girl’s knee-highs

I think the list would have gone on all day and night, but we needed to get crackin’ on actually accomplishing a few completed bracelets and then gifting them. This likely would have led to another list, but I snagged the pencil from Piper. Sheesh, if there’s a badge for List Making that kiddo would be Chapter Leader in no time.

photo by Bunches and Bits {Karina} via Flickr.com

There are approximately 7.4 billion people in the world right now.

We have nearly enough friendship bracelets for everyone.

I’m. Not. Even. Kidding.

photo by Diane Industrialart Purdie via Flickr.com

Piper and Andy picked out the very best, the most beautiful, the one that took the most work and time, the one they treasured out of them all, and they gave it to …

Me.

Don’t be jelly of my fruit leather, hollyhock stalk, dental floss, and ribbon bracelet, my farmgirls. It is one of a kind, yes, but you too can have a priceless symbol of your neighbor kids’ affection. Just teach them this badge!

Continue reading →